On the 13th of July 2006, the day after
hostilities had broken out in Southern lebanon, a routine
daily report from a Red Cross Team attached to a UN fact-finding
group operating from the city of Tyre stated that two of
the company were missing. No details were filed as to the
nature of the incident that led to their disappearance and
when comparing this incident with other similar events where
individuals had either been fatally wounded, abducted or
vanished, it appeared as if strict procedures had either
not been followed or had not been reported as required.
Though these anomalies were initially
attributed to the hasty withdrawal by the UN to vacate the
city of Tyre, several journalists were suspicious of the
lack of any press releases or discussion over the two missing
aid workers. Most speculation over the affair in the US
and UK media was blocked by heavy gagging orders. However,
in the European and International press, and particularly
upon the Internet, theories began to emerge that the two
'missing' aid workers were in fact agents working for the
CIA or MI6.
Facing a barrage of Freedom of Information
requests, The US government eventually released a lengthy
document of 'collaborated testimony' that it had gathered
from the conflict. A heavily edited report in the appendix
from two 'Friendly Operatives,' referenced only as Sea-Monkey
Charlie and Sea-Monkey Foxtrot, does seem to tally with
the 'disappearance of the two aid workers on the 13th July.
A few extracts of the more interesting
information appear below. Some readers may find the details
of these reports deeply disturbing and shocking.
15.07.06 -
Just south of Marwaheen, close to the border.
Reports of gunfire sound throughout the night, many Israeli
forces were heard shouting uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh
and the Hizbullah guerilla responded with yells of peown-peown
peown-peown.
There have been multiple casualties.
Despite seeing many shot in the arms, head and abdominal
region, all fatal wounds seem to be affect the stomach area.
We saw several casualties staggering around for up to five
minutes gripping their stomachs and muttering 'eurgh uuurgh
uuuuurgh' before slowly collapsing to the ground.
The only wounds not inflicted upon
the stomach occurred when we saw a small exchange of fire
between factions on the outskirts of the city of Tyre. Hizbullah
fighters accused some retreating Israeli soldiers of not
taking their shots. The Israelis, quoting the Geneva convention
upon this very issue, responded that they had only been
hit in the legs, at which point they all adopted a mild
limp and continued to run away.
16.07.06
- On the border near Aitaroun.
A similar incident also occurred to the west of Aitaroun
in a small farming village near a strategic bridge that
has seen some heavy fighting over 2 consecutive nights.
A group of Hizbullah patrolling the bridge at night, when
caught in a crossfire, refused to accept having been shot
claiming that the Israelis must have run out of bullets
by now.
This led to rapid shouts of 'reload'
from the Israeli side and the firing continued, however
the Hizbullah stated that they had shot all the Israelis
long before they had shouted reload. In response to this
the Israeli commander dutifully informed the Hizbullah leader
that they all had bullet proof vests on anyway.
17.07.06
- East of Sidon.
An Israeli platoon, pursuing two groups of Hizbullah rocket
units deep within Lebanon, was taken by surrpise by a sudden
counter-attack.
A Hizbullah leader yelled "Ha! We put
mines there so you're all dead."
Holding their ground, the Israeli commander
responded, "But you ran across there first before we did."
The Hizbullah responded with "Ahh, no,
because we had special shoes on."
19.07.06
- North of Tiberias.
Today we witnessed a rocket attack on an Israeli command
post.
A Hizbullah soldier ran in with one
hand in the air screaming eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeoooooouw and
then he proceeded to walk from one end of the installation
to a point three quarters of the way along its perimeter
declaring "Right, everything from there to there has just
been blown up."
At this point an Israeli on the edge
of the compound said "Well I was outside here so I've just
shot you."
The Hizbullah man calmly replied that
he wasn't really here, it was just a rocket they had fired
and so therefore the Israeli soldier was stupid and that
his father cleaned toilets in Ethiopia.
20.07.06
- On the border near Avivm.
On Thursday night it had looked as if there might be a resolve
to the conflict as an exchange of prisoners was agreed to
take place the following morning.
However, Hizbullah discovered three
Israeli spies deep within their territory just hours later
and accused them of attempting to sneak up to the hostages
and touch their hands and shout 'release' in order to free
these prisoners outside of the agreed exchange.
Neither side would back down. In response
to accusations that none of their troops knew what a girls
bits looked like, Hizbullah issued a statement that the
Israeli troops were all gay anyway. No talks to resolve
this latest dispute were possible, as the Israelis were
called home for their tea and Hizbullah went off on their
bikes to spy on the girl's netball practice.
